Home Depot

I've heard conflicting reports from friends in other states, saying that this situation is reversed for them, but I have to say that the Home Depot has done a great job of making me a Lowe's customer.

I can't even say that it's little things.  Or maybe it is little things that's just added up over the years to become big things.

Narrow Aisles with lots of Crap In Them

First of all, I think the aisles at all three of my nearby Home Depots are only about as wide as two of their carts.  That's a problem because, as we all know, people are inconsiderate morons and leave their carts in the middle of the aisle when they're looking at screws.  One tries to be polite, stopping and waiting, or maybe making a coughing sound, and sometimes they realize that they're inconsiderate morons.  More often than not I have to reach out and move their cart for them.  Then the realize they were inconsiderate morons and say, "Oh, sorry," and make grand motions of moving their cart.

As if this weren't bad enough, Home Depot always seems to have something they're pushing to sell (at regular prices) so they have lots of cardboard displays in the aisles, making it an obstacle course.  Yes, I understand the marketing reasons behind this: impulse buying as you see something.  "Gee, I guess I really do need some WD-40."  However, if you're trying to navigate an aisle or get to the exit with a cart filled with 10 eight-foot lengths of molding, it's a real pain in the ass.  Or, if you're trying to navigate the narrow aisles even with people who aren't inconsiderate morons and have their carts to the side, there's not enough room to get by or you feel like you're navigating an obstacle course.

Lowe's is pretty crap free in their aisles.  They have a few displays, but they're generally put at the end of the aisles as something of a speed bump to keep people from rushing into the cross-aisles.

Customer Service

A couple of months ago we bought a palette of tile.  Unfortunately, the truck I had at my disposal only could take about half of it at a time, so I called ahead one time and said, "Hey, here's my order, and I'll be there around five to pick it up."  They told me that they'd have it all ready and even thanked me for my forethought of calling ahead.

So I got there and not only did they have no idea who I was, and not only was the tile not ready, but it wasn't even on the floor, meaning that they had to get a forklift, block off four aisles, etc. to get a pallet down so that I could take half of it.  I got there at five.  By the time I was done showing them that I actually had already paid for it and loaded up, it was six-thirty.

I'd like to say that this was an isolated incident, but it wasn't.

We needed some flooring for doing a closet.  I'd done another job using a type of flooring that I really liked, so I wanted to get some more of that.  I went to the Home Depot I'd bought the original stuff at, but they don't carry that anymore.  So I called home and listed some options.  Laura called other Home Depots looking for the same stuff (even using the exact model number) and was told by another nearby one that they had 96 cases.  So I drove up there.  No, they don't have 96 cases of it.  Didn't have 1.  Didn't carry it.  (I later discovered that it's not even made any longer.)

So I started looking at other options and found a flooring I liked.  Got the adhesive and it recommended a 1/8" x 1/8" notched trowel.  Care to guess what Home Depot doesn't carry?  If you guessed, "A 1/8-inch by 1/8-inch notched trowel," you win.  I asked a passing "customer service" person about this, and they said they'd call someone to come help me.  I kept looking around and couldn't find the trowel, but I got the other tools I would need, thinking that someone else would come by.  Ambushed another "customer service" person and asked them.  They had no idea.  I asked what department they worked in.  "Flooring," they replied.

I looked at my cart that was filled with 10 boxes of parquet flooring, adhesive, and tools, looked at the "customer service" person, and said, "Enjoy putting all of this away."

I went to Lowe's and bought everything I needed in one trip and had excellent help.  The woman suggested a tool I didn't think I'd need but bought it anyway, figuring I could return it if unused, and it turned out to be an invaluable suggestion on her part.  And she gave me, no charge, a nice booklet with tips about putting in the type of flooring that I'd chosen; I'd overlooked it on the shelf.  She also kept me from buying the edging spacers, saying, "Got a table saw?  Cut up a bunch of 1/8-inch slats from a scrap two-by-four."

Looking Forward

I've decided to be a Lowe's customer.  Or Ace.  Or True Value.  Maybe you don't have that option.  But if you've got the same complaints, I'm suggesting a grass roots campaign with some things I think will help Home Depot get their act together.  Some of these take a little extra time, but that's what this kinda thing is all about.

• Unfortunately, we can't do anything about inconsiderate morons as customers.  The law frowns on violence.  But try this: At the top of your lungs, yell, "Can you please move your cart aside in this narrow-ass aisle?"
• If there's crap in the aisles, hit the crap with your cart.  I've done this, and it's immensely gratifying.  Cans are the best as they really scatter.  Hammers just tumble.  But a display of 20D nails is a real crowd-pleaser.
• When some idiot doesn't have the answer, take their name down and go up to the customer service desk to complain about them.  This will also get you more exercise as you'll probably be making a lot of trips to complain.
• When they don't have all the things you need for a project, load up the cart anyway.  Even put things in that you don't need.  Then leave the cart (in the middle of an aisle, of course) and depart.
• Visit the Home Depot's web site and complain.  I've done this without ever hearing one bit of a response, so this is probably akin to pissing into a wind storm, but it may make you feel better.

I don't really care if Home Depot gets their act together.

The prices at Lowe's are similar, I'm less frustrated leaving there, and the customer service seems to be superior.

Example: the other day I went into Lowe's and asked the first person I saw where I might find a small belt I needed for a rock polisher.  She didn't know, but she took me to someone who she thought would.  He took one look at it and suggested a couple of ideas he didn't think would work, but then told me to go to a vacuum repair place down the road.  So he suggested I go spend my money somewhere else and be happy rather than frustrated.  Brilliant!  I like that!.

Added gripe: someone had a spoof website called HomeDespot.com.  It's gone now.  Wanna bet that HomeDepot sued them because they have no sense of humor?